Sunday, May 18, 2014

The Trouble with Godzilla

I saw "Godzilla" yesterday, a film I'd been looking forward to since last summer.

Sadly to say, I was grossly disappointed.

Here is a bullet pointed list explaining why:

  • There wasn't nearly enough Bryan Cranston.  For a film that wanted to have monologues and focus on character, they didn't utilize the best actor asset they had.
  • The film also didn't have nearly enough Godzilla.  The bug creature things got way more screen time, and were generally unpleasant to look at.  [I really, really hate bugs.]
  • Not!Mary Kate or Ashely Olsen bothered me.  Maybe it's because I keep thinking of her sisters, but something about her face seems off.  Could be her nose.  As for her character--she was so terribly disinterested in the welfare of her husband, who potentially could have been dead, to the point where she makes one phone call to locate him, then leaves her phone on vibrate.  Um... 
  • Anytime there was a decent action scene a-brewin', it would jump cut to several moments (sometimes hours) later.  Why?  Did they not have enough money in their budget to fund the CGI?  Speaking of--
  • Why the crap does Godzilla have cankles?  He didn't look very lizard like...
  • After all of the in depth backstory and explaining how these massive beings came to be, I am still unsure of where Godzilla was all that time (admittedly, I lost about 20-30 minutes of the film, for I fell asleep), or why they thought, sorry, knew he would battle the other two giant creatures to the death.
  • And finally, the biggest flaw with this film?  They didn't have Stephen Spielberg at the helm. I think under his supervision, it would have been done how it was supposed to be.  I'm not sure anyone lesser could pull off this particular film properly.  Peter Jackson may have also been a good choice (but my money's on Spielberg).

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