Friday, June 22, 2012

Diary of a Fangirl: "Magic Mike"

So, last night, my BFF and I went to a premier for the film "Magic Mike."  Of the cast, Channing Tatum, Matt Bomer, Alex Pettyfer, Joe Maganiello, and Matthew McConaughey, I only really found Maganiello and McConaughey truly attractive. 

And then I saw the film.

Channing Tatum, I knew from his debut movie "Step Up" which I hadn't actually seen, was a real dancer.  What I didn't know, however, is that he was a stripper in real life before he got into acting.  And good grief, did it show!  The way his body was like poetry.  Really naughty and terribly hot poetry, but still--poetry.  Like a fabulous hybrid of Pablo Neruda and Harold Robbins.  I know they put an actual story into this film, but I really didn't care.  Also, there were way too many close ups of the lead female character, played by Cody Horn.  A film that is clearly catering to women (or gay men) really doesn't need that many close ups of some chick the audience at large doesn't give a piss about.  And I swear--nearly every frame she was in was a CLOSE UP.  What the hell, Steven Soderbergh?  Those close ups should have been on reserve for Joe Magianello's abs, which I didn't get to see enough of.

Ah, Joe--a magnificent specimen is he.  And I wouldn't mind a dance or two or three with him.  But Channing--he was blessed with some moves.  Methinks his wife is quite happy.

Matthew's character Dallas spent the entire film with pants much like those above on--low on the hips, showing that delectable pelvic bone.  I swear the audience waited with bated breath throughout the entire movie for those bad boys to simply fall off.

Alex Pettyfer--never heard of him, but boy was he nice to look at.  And once his character learned the moves, I could tell he had either some background in the area, or it was simply natural talent.  Either way, I had fun watching.  And Matt Bomer?

Very pretty face with a great head of hair, but man, what a waste on that stage.  His character (or the actor's moves...whatever) was doing a good job of killing my squee and deflating my metaphorical jolly.  Yeah, they could have done without that guy, and put Michael Fassbender or Alexander Skarsgard up there instead.  I have no idea if they can dance or not, but if I have to just look at a guy cause he's damned pretty, I'd rather it be them.  Speaking of--

Tom Cruise's "Rock of Ages" persona Stacee Jaxx could have been on that stage as well.  Cruise simmply oozed sex appeal in the film, and I wish he had been in it more (like in it for 85% of the time).

Anyway, if you have a moment next week, I suggest going to see "Magic Mike."  You may need some "quality time" alone soon after, though...

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